disregards her. The silly being affects to be learned ， pretends to examine
the canonical books ， lends her aid toward the new-fashioned reformation
of Christendom， moral and critical ， and shrugs up her shoulders at
the mention of Lavater's enthusiasm. Her health is destroyed， on account
of which she is prevented from having any enjoyment here below. Only such
a creature could have cut down my walnut trees！ I can never pardon it.
Hear her reasons. The falling leaves made the court wet and dirty ； the
branches obstructed the light ； boys threw stones at the nuts when they
were ripe ， and the noise affected her nerves； and disturbed her profound
meditations ， when she was weighing the diffculties of Kennicot， Semler，
and Michaelis. Finding that all the parish， particularly the old people，
were displeased ， I asked "why they allowed it ？" "Ah ， sir！" they
replied ， "when the steward orders ， what can we poor peasants do ？
" But one thing has happened well. The steward and the vicar（who ， for
once， thought to reap some advantage from the caprices of his wife ）
intended to divide the trees between them. The revenue-office ， being
informed of it， revived an old claim to the ground where the trees had
stood ， and sold them to the best bidder. There they still lie on the
ground. If I were the sovereign ， I should know how to deal with them
all ， vicar， steward， and revenue-office. Sovereign， did I say？ I
should， in that case ， care little about the trees that grew in the
country.
OCTOBER 10. Only to gaze upon her dark eyes is to me a source of happiness！
And what grieves me ， is ， that Albert does not seem so happy as he
—— hoped to be—— as I should have been—— if —— I am no friend
to these pauses ， but here I cannot express it otherwise ； and probably
I am explicit enough.
OCTOBER 12. Ossian has superseded Homer in my heart. To what a world
does the illustrious bard carry me！ To wander over pathless wilds， surrounded
by impetuous whirlwinds ， where， by the feeble light of the moon， we
see the spirits of our ancestors； to hear from the mountain-tops ， mid
the roar of torrents， their plaintive sounds issuing from deep caverns，
and the sorrowful lamentations of a maiden who sighs and expires on the
mossy tomb of the warrior by whom she was adored. I meet this bard with
silver hair ； he wanders in the valley ； he seeks the footsteps of his
fathers ， and， alas ！ he finds only their tombs. Then， contemplating
the pale moon ， as she sinks beneath the waves of the rolling sea， the
memory of bygone days strikes the mind of the hero， days when approaching
danger invigorated the brave， and the moon shone upon his bark laden
with spoils ， and returning in triumph. When I read in his countenance
deep sorrow ， when I see his dying glory sink exhausted into the grave，
as he inhales new and heart-thrilling delight from his approaching union
with his beloved， and he casts a look on the cold earth and the tall
grass which is so soon to cover him ， and then exclaims， "The traveller
will come ，—— he will come who has seen my beauty， and he will ask，
'Where is the bard， where is the illustrious son of Fingal ？' He will
walk over my tomb ， and will seek me in vain ！" Then， O my friend，
I could instantly ， like a true and noble knight ， draw my sword， and
deliver my prince from the long and painful languor of a living death ，
and dismiss my own soul to follow the demigod whom my hand had set free！
OCTOBER 19. Alas！ the void the fearful void， which I feel in my
bosom ！ Sometimes I think， if I could only once but once， press her
to my heart ， this dreadful void would be filled.
OCTOBER 26. Yes ， I feel certain ， Wilhelm， and every day I become
more certain， that the existence of any being whatever is of very little
consequence. A friend of Charlotte's called to see her just now. I withdrew
into a neighbouring apartment ， and took up a book ； but， finding I
could not read， I sat down to write. I heard them converse in an undertone
： they spoke upon indifferent topics ， and retailed the news of the
town. One was going to be married ； another was ill， very ill ， she
had a dry cough ， her face was growing thinner daily ， and she had occasional
fits. "N—— is very unwell too ，" said Charlotte. "His limbs begin to
swell already ，" answered the other； and my lively imagination carried
me at once to the beds of the infirm. There I see them struggling against
death ， with all the agonies of pain and horror； and these women， Wilhelm，
talk of all this with as much indifference as one would mention the death
of a stranger. And when I look around the apartment where I now am——
when I see Charlotte's apparel lying before me， and Albert's writings，
and all those articles of furniture which are so familiar to me ， even
to the very inkstand which I am using ，—— when I think what I am to
this family —— everything. My friends esteem me ； I often contribute
to their happiness， and my heart seems as if it could not beat without
them； and yet—— if I were to die ， if I were to be summoned from the
midst of this circle， would they feel—— or how long would they feel
the void which my loss would make in their existence？ How long ！ Yes，
such is the frailty of man， that even there， where he has the greatest
consciousness of his own being， where he makes the strongest and most
forcible impression ， even in the memory ， in the heart ， of his beloved，
there also he must perish ，—— vanish ，—— and that quickly.
OCTOBER 27. I could tear open my bosom with vexation to think how
little we are capable of influencing the feelings of each other. No one
can communicate to me those sensations of love， joy， rapture， and delight
which I do not naturally possess； and， though my heart may glow with
the most lively affection ， I cannot make the happiness of one in whom
the same warmth is not inherent.
OCTOBER 27： Evening. I possess so much ， but my love for her absorbs
it all. I possess so much ， but without her I have nothing.
OCTOBER 30. One hundred times have I been on the point of embracing
her. Heavens！ what a torment it is to see so much loveliness passing
and repassing before us ， and yet not dare to lay hold of it ！ And laying
hold is the most natural of human instincts. Do not children touch everything
they see？ And I！
NOVEMBER 3. Witness ， Heaven ， how often I lie down in my bed with
a wish， and even a hope， that I may never awaken again. And in the morning，
when I open my eyes ， I behold the sun once more ， and am wretched.
If I were whimsical ， I might blame the weather， or an acquaintance ，
or some personal disappointment ， for my discontented mind ； and then
this insupportable load of trouble would not rest entirely upon myself.
But ， alas ！ I feel it too sadly. I am alone the cause of my own woe，
am I not？ Truly， my own bosom contains the source of all my sorrow，
as it previously contained the source of all my pleasure. Am I not the
same being who once enjoyed an excess of happiness， who， at every step，
saw paradise open before him， and whose heart was ever expanded toward
the whole world ？ And this heart is now dead ， no sentiment can revive
it； my eyes are dry； and my senses， no more refreshed by the influence
of soft tears ， wither and consume my brain. I suffer much ， for I have
lost the only charm of life ： that active， sacred power which created
worlds around me，—— it is no more. When I look from my window at the
distant hills ， and behold the morning sun breaking through the mists，
and illuminating the country around ， which is still wrapped in silence，
whilst the soft stream winds gently through the willows ， which have
shed their leaves ； when glorious nature displays all her beauties before
me， and her wondrous prospects are ineffectual to extract one tear of
joy from my withered heart， I feel that in such a moment I stand like
a reprobate before heaven ， hardened ， insensible ， and unmoved. Oftentimes
do I then bend my knee to the earth ， and implore God for the blessing
of tears， as the desponding labourer in some scorching climate prays
for the dews of heaven to moisten his parched corn. But I feel that God
does not grant sunshine or rain to our importunate entreaties. And oh ，
those bygone days ， whose memory now torments me ！ why were they so
fortunate ？ Because I then waited with patience for the blessings of
the Eternal ， and received his gifts with the grateful feelings of a
thankful heart.
NOVEMBER 8. Charlotte has reproved me for my excesses ， with so much
tenderness and goodness ！ I have lately been in the habit of drinking
more wine than heretofore. "Don't do it ，" she said. "Think of Charlotte！
" "Think of you ！" I answered； "need you bid me do so ？ Think of you
—— I do not think of you： you are ever before my soul！ This very morning
I sat on the spot where ， a few days ago ， you descended from the carriage，
and ——" She immediately changed the subject to prevent me from pursuing
it farther. My dear friend， my energies are all prostrated ： she can
do with me what she pleases.
NOVEMBER 15. I thank you， Wilhelm， for your cordial sympathy， for
your excellent advice ； and I implore you to be quiet. Leave me to my
sufferings. In spite of my wretchedness ， I have still strength enough
for endurance. I revere religion—— you know I do. I feel that it can
impart strength to the feeble and comfort to the afflicted， but does
it affect all men equally ？ Consider this vast universe： you will see
thousands for whom it has never existed ， thousands for whom it will
never exist ， whether it be preached to them ， or not ； and must it，
then， necessarily exist for me ？ Does not the Son of God himself say
that they are his whom the Father has given to him？ Have I been given
to him？ What if the Father will retain me for himself， as my heart sometimes
suggests？ I pray you ， do not misinterpret this. Do not extract derision
from my harmless words. I pour out my whole soul before you. Silence were
otherwise preferable to me， but I need not shrink from a subject of which
few know more than I do myself. What is the destiny of man， but to fill
up the measure of his sufferings， and to drink his allotted cup of bitterness？
And if that same cup proved bitter to the God of heaven ， under a human
form， why should I affect a foolish pride， and call it sweet？ Why should
I be ashamed of shrinking at that fearful moment， when my whole being
will tremble between existence and annihilation ， when a remembrance
of the past ， like a flash of lightning， will illuminate the dark gulf
of futurity ， when everything shall dissolve around me ， and the whole
world vanish away ？ Is not this the voice of a creature oppressed beyond
all resource， self-deficient ， about to plunge into inevitable destruction，
and groaning deeply at its inadequate strength， "My God！ my God ！ why
hast thou forsaken me ？" And should I feel ashamed to utter the same
expression？ Should I not shudder at a prospect which had its fears ，
even for him who folds up the heavens like a garment？
NOVEMBER 21. She does not feel， she does not know， that she is preparing
a poison which will destroy us both ； and I drink deeply of the draught
which is to prove my destruction. What mean those looks of kindness with
which she often —— often？ no ， not often， but sometimes， regards
me， that complacency with which she hears the involuntary sentiments
which frequently escape me， and the tender pity for my sufferings which
appears in her countenance？
Yesterday ， when I took leave she seized me by the hand， and said，
"Adieu， dear Werther." Dear Werther！ It was the first time she ever
called me dear： the sound sunk deep into my heart. I have repeated it
a hundred times ； and last night ， on going to bed， and talking to
myself of various things， I suddenly said， "Good night， dear Werther
！" and then could not but laugh at myself.
NOVEMBER 22. I cannot pray， "Leave her to me ！" and yet she often
seems to belong to me. I cannot pray， "Give her to me！" for she is another's.
In this way I affect mirth over my troubles ； and， if I had time， I
could compose a whole litany of antitheses.
NOVEMBER 24. She is sensible of my sufferings. This morning her look
pierced my very soul. I found her alone ， and she was silent ： she steadfastly
surveyed me. I no longer saw in her face the charms of beauty or the fire
of genius ： these had disappeared. But I was affected by an expression
much more touching， a look of the deepest sympathy and of the softest
pity. Why was I afraid to throw myself at her feet？ Why did I not dare
to take her in my arms， and answer her by a thousand kisses？ She had
recourse to her piano for relief， and in a low and sweet voice accompanied
the music with delicious sounds. Her lips never appeared so lovely： they
seemed but just to open ， that they might imbibe the sweet tones which
issued from the instrument， and return the heavenly vibration from her
lovely mouth. Oh！ who can express my sensations？ I was quite overcome，
and ， bending down ， pronounced this vow： "Beautiful lips， which the
angels guard， never will I seek to profane your purity with a kiss."
And yet ， my friend， oh ， I wish —— but my heart is darkened by doubt
and indecision—— could I but taste felicity ， and then die to expiate
the sin ！ What sin ？
NOVEMBER 26. Oftentimes I say to myself ， "Thou alone art wretched
： all other mortals are happy， none are distressed like thee！" Then
I read a passage in an ancient poet ， and I seem to understand my own
heart. I have so much to endure ！ Have men before me ever been so wretched？
NOVEMBER 30. I shall never be myself again！ Wherever I go， some
fatality occurs to distract me. Even to-day alas—— for our destiny！
alas for human nature ！
About dinner-time I went to walk by the river-side， for I had no
appetite. Everything around seemed gloomy ： a cold and damp easterly
wind blew from the mountains， and black， heavy clouds spread over the
plain. I observed at a distance a man in a tattered coat： he was wandering
among the rocks ， and seemed to be looking for plants. When I approached，
he turned round at the noise； and I saw that he had an interesting countenance
in which a settled melancholy ， strongly marked by benevolence ， formed
the principal feature. His long black hair was divided， and flowed over
his shoulders. As his garb betokened a person of the lower order， I thought
he would not take it ill if I inquired about his business ； and I therefore
asked what he was seeking. He replied ， with a deep sigh ， that he was
looking for flowers ， and could find none. "But it is not the season ，
" I observed， with a smile. "Oh， there are so many flowers！" he answered，
as he came nearer to me. "In my garden there are roses and honeysuckles
of two sorts： one sort was given to me by my father！ they grow as plentifully
as weeds； I have been looking for them these two days， and cannot find
them. There are flowers out there ， yellow ， blue ， and red； and that
centaury has a very pretty blossom： but I can find none of them." I observed
his peculiarity ， and therefore asked him， with an air of indifference，
what he intended to do with his flowers. A strange smile overspread his
countenance. Holding his finger to his mouth， he expressed a hope that
I would not betray him； and he then informed me that he had promised
to gather a nosegay for his mistress. "That is right，" said I. "Oh ！
" he replied， "she possesses many other things as well ： she is very
rich." "And yet ，" I continued ， "she likes your nosegays." "Oh ， she
has jewels and crowns ！" he exclaimed. I asked who she was. "If the states-general
would but pay me，" he added， "I should be quite another man. Alas ！
there was a time when I was so happy； but that is past ， and I am now
——" He raised his swimming eyes to heaven. "And you were happy once ？
" I observed. "Ah ， would I were so still！" was his reply. "I was then
as gay and contented as a man can be." An old woman ， who was coming
toward us ， now called out ， "Henry ， Henry！ where are you？ We have
been looking for you everywhere ： come to dinner." "Is he your son ？
" I inquired， as I went toward her. "Yes ，" she said： "he is my poor，
unfortunate son. The Lord has sent me a heavy affliction." I asked whether
he had been long in this state. She answered， "He has been as calm as
he is at present for about six months. I thank Heaven that he has so far
recovered ： he was for one whole year quite raving ， and chained down
in a madhouse. Now he injures no one， but talks of nothing else than
kings and queens. He used to be a very good ， quiet youth， and helped
to maintain me； he wrote a very fine hand； but all at once he became
melancholy， was seized with a violent fever， grew distracted， and is
now as you see. If I were only to tell you， sir——" I interrupted her
by asking what period it was in which he boasted of having been so happy.
"Poor boy ！" she exclaimed ， with a smile of cormpassion， "he means
the time when he was completely deranged， a time he never ceases to regret，
when he was in the madhouse ， and unconscious of everything." I was thunderstruck
： I placed a piece of money in her hand， and hastened away.
"You were happy ！" I exclaimed ， as I returned quickly to the town，
"'as gay and contented as a man can be！'" God of heaven！ and is this
the destiny of man？ Is he only happy before he has acquired his reason，
or after he has lost it ？ Unfortunate being！ And yet I envy your fate
： I envy the delusion to which you are a victim. You go forth with joy
to gather flowers for your princess ，—— in winter，—— and grieve
when you can find none， and cannot understand why they do not grow. But
I wander forth without joy， without hope ， without design ； and I return
as I came. You fancy what a man you would be if the states general paid
you. Happy mortal ， who can ascribe your wretchedness to an earthly cause！
You do not know ， you do not feel， that in your own distracted heart
and disordered brain dwells the source of that unhappiness which all the
potentates on earth cannot relieve.
Let that man die unconsoled who can deride the invalid for undertaking
a journey to distant， healthful springs， where he often finds only a
heavier disease and a more painful death， or who can exult over the despairing
mind of a sinner， who， to obtain peace of conscience and an alleviation
of misery ， makes a pilgrimage to the Holy Sepulchre. Each laborious
step which galls his wounded feet in rough and untrodden paths pours a
drop of balm into his troubled soul ， and the journey of many a weary
day brings a nightly relief to his anguished heart. Will you dare call
this enthusiasm ， ye crowd of pompous declaimers ？ Enthusiasm ！ 0 God！
thou seest my tears. Thou hast allotted us our portion of misery： must
we also have brethren to persecute us ， to deprive us of our consolation，
of our trust in thee， and in thy love and mercy？ For our trust in the
virtue of the healing root， or in the strength of the vine ， what is
it else than a belief in thee from whom all that surrounds us derives
its healing and restoring powers？ Father ， whom I know not，—— who
wert once wont to fill my soul， but who now hidest thy face from me，
—— call me back to thee ； be silent no longer； thy silence shall not
delay a soul which thirsts after thee. What man ， what father， could
be angry with a son for returning to him suddenly ， for falling on his
neck， and exclaiming ， "I am here again ， my father！ forgive me if
I have anticipated my journey ， and returned before the appointed time！
The world is everywhere the same，—— a scene of labour and pain ， of
pleasure and reward ； but what does it all avail ？ I am happy only where
thou art， and in thy presence am I content to suffer or enjoy." And wouldst
thou， heavenly Father， banish such a child from thy presence？
DECEMBER 1. Wilhelm ， the man about whom I wrote to you—— that
man so enviable in his misfortunes—— was secretary to Charlotte's father
； and an unhappy passion for her which he cherished， concealed， and
at length discovered， caused him to be dismissed from his situation.
This made him mad. Think， whilst you peruse this plain narration ， what
an impression the circumstance has made upon me ！ But it was related
to me by Albert with as much calmness as you will probably peruse it.
DECEMBER 4. I implore your attention. It is all over with me. I can
support this state no longer. To-day I was sitting by Charlotte. She was
playing upon her piano a succession of delightful melodies， with such
intense expression！ Her little sister was dressing her doll upon my lap.
The tears came into my eyes. I leaned down， and looked intently at her
wedding-ring： my tears fell—— immediately she began to play that favourite，
that divine ， air which has so often enchanted me. I felt comfort from
a recollection of the past， of those bygone days when that air was familiar
to me ； and then I recalled all the sorrows and the disappointments which
I had since endured. I paced with hasty strides through the room， my
heart became convulsed with painful emotions. At length I went up to her，
and exclaimed With eagerness， "For Heaven's sake ， play that air no
longer！" She stopped ， and looked steadfastly at me. She then said，
with a smile which sunk deep into my heart， "Werther ， you are ill：
your dearest food is distasteful to you. But go ， I entreat you， and
endeavour to compose yourself." I tore myself away. God ， thou seest
my torments ， and wilt end them！
DECEMBER 6. How her image haunts me ！ Waking or asleep ， she fills
my entire soul！ Soon as I close my eyes， here ， in my brain， where
all the nerves of vision are concentrated ， her dark eyes are imprinted.
Here—— I do not know how to describe it ； but， if I shut my eyes，
hers are immediately before me： dark as an abyss they open upon me ，
and absorb my senses.
And what is man —— that boasted demigod ？ Do not his powers fail
when he most requires their use ？ And whether he soar in joy ， or sink
in sorrow ， is not his career in both inevitably arrested？ And， whilst
he fondly dreams that he is grasping at infinity， does he not feel compelled
to return to a consciousness of his cold， monotonous existence ？
THE EDITOR TO THE READER.
It is a matter of extreme regret that we want original evidence of
the last remarkable days of our friend； and we are ， therefore， obliged
to interrupt the progress of his correspondence ， and to supply the deficiency
by a connected narration.
I have felt it my duty to collect accurate information from the mouths
of persons well acquainted with his history. The story is simple； and
all the accounts agree， except in some unimportant particulars. It is
true， that ， with respect to the characters of the persons spoken of，
opinions and judgments vary.
We have only， then ， to relate conscientiously the facts which our
diligent labour has enabled us to collect ， to give the letters of the
deceased， and to pay particular attention to the slightest fragment from
his pen ， more especially as it is so difficult to discover the real
and correct motives of men who are not of the common order.
Sorrow and discontent had taken deep root in Werther's soul ， and
gradually imparted their character to his whole being. The harmony of
his mind became completely disturbed； a perpetual excitement and mental
irritation， which weakened his natural powers， produced the saddest
etfects upon him， and rendered him at length the victim of an exhaustion
against which he struggled with still more painful efforts than he had
displayed ， even in contending with his other misfortunes. His mental
anxiety weakened his various good qualities ； and he was soon converted
into a gloomy companion ， always unhappy and unjust in his ideas ， the
more wretched he became. This was ， at least ， the opinion of Albert's
friends. They assert， moreover ， that the character of Albert himself
had undergone no change in the meantime ： he was still the same being
whom Werther had loved， honoured ， and respected from the commencement.
His love for Charlotte was unbounded： he was proud of her， and desired
that she should be recognised by every one as the noblest of created beings.
Was he， however， to blame for wishing to avert from her every appearance
of suspicion？ or for his unwillingness to share his rich prize with another，
even for a moment ， and in the most innocent manner？ It is asserted
that Albert frequently retired from his wife's apartment during Werther's
visits； but this did not arise from hatred or aversion to his friend ，
but only from a feeling that his presence was oppressive to Werther.
Charlotte's father， who was confined to the house by indisposition，
was accustomed to send his carriage for her ， that she might make excursions
in the neighbourhood. One day the weather had been unusually severe ，
and the whole country was covered with snow.
Werther went for Charlotte the following morning， in order that，
if Albert were absent ， he might conduct her home.
The beautiful weather produced but little impression on his troubled
spirit. A heavy weight lay upon his soul， deep melancholy had taken possession
of him， and his mind knew no change save from one painful thought to
another.
